Tag Archives: Do-it-yourself

Kids cars turned into mobility devices

Dr. Cole Galloway is turning kids toy cars into mobility devices and physical therapy for young children. This is making a lot of people happy – especially the little kids who get to drive the cool cars.

Learn more about the University of Delaware Go Baby Go! program here.

Read more about this on Upworthy here.

Accountability -vs- Forgiveness

Accountability has gotten a bad rap.  American culture sees accountability as a punishment, and forgiveness as a sign of a good person.

I have a different take.

Here are samples of the same conversation:  one from a forgiveness perspective, one from an accountability perspective, using the random names Mike and Jim.

Forgiveness Conversation

Mike spills the milk on the table.

Jim, upset, points out Mike’s milk is soaking into Jim’s papers!

Mike denies he spilled the milk, and/or makes excuses for why he spilled the milk:  he was tired; he was distracted; he didn’t see the milk there; it was someone else’s fault for placing the milk on the table in the first place.

Jim frantically works to keep his remaining papers dry, and in exasperation calls Mike to Get A Towel!

Mike wrings his hands crying “don’t be mad at me, it wasn’t my INTENT to spill the milk, I really AM a good person, I TRY my best, EVERYONE makes mistakes, don’t hold it against me!”

Jim gets a towel himself and cleans up the mess, sad/angry/disappointed/upset/ that Mike didn’t admit to his own mess or in any way help to clean it up.

Mike pleads “Will you forgive me?”

Accountability Conversation

Mike spills the milk on the table, and immediately says “Jim – grab your papers off the table!”  Mike quickly fetches a towel to clean up the mess.

Jim quickly picks up his papers, focusing on the most important ones.

Mike cleans up the mess, dries the table, and says “Hey man, sorry if I ruined any of your papers – is there anything I can do to make it right?”

Jim answers gratefully “I really appreciate your quick action to clean up the accident. I saved most of the papers, but a few got wet.  I’ll dry them out and check to see if I need to re-write any.  Thanks for asking though.”

Accountability brings out personal characteristics such as strength, resilience, quick thinking, problem solving, caring, helpfulness, satisfaction, self-mastery and concern.  Reactions to this caring response are trust, thankfulness, appreciation, and feeling valued.  If Mike wasn’t aware he spilled the milk, as soon as Jim brought it up, Mike would have switched into accountability mode and went straight to cleaning up the mess.  There is mutual respect and trust with an interaction where a person takes personal responsibility and accountability for accidents or hurts they have caused.  Both parties feel like winners.

Forgiveness brings out personal characteristics such as the inability to take responsibility, inflexibility, lack of empathy, neediness, denial, defensiveness, excuses, blame, guilt, and pride. Reactions are exasperation, disappointment, feeling devalued, and feeling unheard. There is a mutual mistrust and imbalance of power, where Mike feels like a victim even though Mike was the one who hurt/inconvenienced Jim. Jim is left in the uncomfortable position of being the ‘bad’ guy if he doesn’t offer forgiveness, and Mike is in the position of feeling weak. No one wins: Both feel they got the raw end of the stick. Even if Jim does say “I forgive you” to keep the peace/look ‘good’, Jim won’t trust Mike in the future since Mike doesn’t take accountability/responsibility for his actions.

In Summary

My hypothesis is, if you have to ASK for forgiveness, you probably haven’t been accountable for your actions.  Instead of asking for forgiveness, ask how you can make it right, then listen.  Better yet – be accountable in the first place – it’s empowering!  You’ll be in the position to make a positive difference, and the person you wronged/hurt will feel heard.

For everyday situations with kind caring empathic people, I think accountability should be the go-to power word, and forgiveness be an un-asked for gift given AFTER the person harmed feels heard.

Article by Barb Hughes

A Cancer Therapy

photo 1Even though I don’t have cancer, many of my friends have walked that road.  So I thought reading this book would be enlightening.

In the book A Cancer Therapy, Dr. Max Gerson gives a foundation to understand how cancer can best be framed so that it can be cured.  According to Dr. Gerson, studies show that cancer is a degenerative disease that takes a long time to develop.  So when we find a lump, that is the culmination of years of degeneration, so much that the liver has finally grown too weak to fight the cancer.  This book is a summary of thirty years of clinical experimentation by Dr. Max Gerson M.D. from the 1930’s-1950’s.  He successfully took advanced cancer patients that traditional medicine had written off, and figured out how to heal the majority of them.

Dr. Gerson said that there is no magic pill that cures cancer.  Yes, if you remove a large cancerous lump, sometimes that takes enough of the toxins out of the body where the liver can resume to clean the rest itself.  But many times there is still so much sickness left in the bone, blood, and organs that’s just not showing signs yet, that the cancer ‘returns’.  Dr. Gerson’s therapy was developed to treat not just the end symptoms (the tumors etc.) but the many causes  – such as toxins from our pesticides and poor soil nutrition, using food and rest medicinally, detoxifying gently and slowly so the body doesn’t go into shock, etc.

This book was first published back in 1958.  Today, as then, this research seems to be the last resort for those with advanced stage cancer who have been told they will die.  So they get this book, find out about the Gerson Institute where they can get updated information on how to treat their disease at home, or go to a clinic where it can be treated for them.  The regime is currently a little less intensive then what was written originally in the book, but it is still a slow, steady, time-consuming walk to healing.  While the typical person prefers a faster more heroic rescue to a slow personal climb, if you’re willing (or desperate) to see results, this book is a fascinating read.

I found some healthy concepts I’d like to use/modify for use in my own life.  The suggestions list of potassium rich veggies and fruits (many I already enjoy, some I want to buy and try out) look like a delicious and easy addition to my diet.  And the detox ideas are ones I may explore in the future as well.

I’ve been using foil wrong all these years!

Here’s a simple way to dispense plastic wrap and foil.  I’ve been doing it wrong all these years.  Boy do I feel stupid glad that I know how to do this the easy way now.

My son is not going to college

Toby dressed as the 'Repair Wizard' at Mac PCx on Halloween 2013

Toby dressed as the ‘Repair Wizard’ at Mac PCx on Halloween 2013

My high school senior is chomping at the bit ready to move on after 14 years of classroom education.  He’s going to high school part time and working part time at a computer store diagnosing and repairing computers.  His past resume includes volunteering at Free Geek where he learned to take apart and put together computers, then trained others to do so.   As a high school sophomore he took computer classes in C++ and other programming languages.  He’s currently studying on his own to get CompTA+ certified, and through a school class learning to write code and design his own website.  He’s been saving up his work money and when he turns 18 plans to purchase professional design software and begin his own software company on the side.

As a parent, I’m getting bombarded at all sides by society telling me my son MUST get a college degree or he’ll never get a living wage job. My son tells me “I know what I want – to work with computers and design computer software.  Why spend 4+ more years in a classroom and be thousands of dollars in debt before I do what I want?”

He’s got a point there.

He says a company should pay to train him in what else they might need because he’s a fast and motivated learner.  He also said that computer technology is growing /changing so fast that what he’d learn in a classroom would be practically obsolete by the time he got out of college, so taking courses now and building on those courses as he works makes more sense than spending his money/time on PE 101 and introduction to Lit classes.  He is studying and problem solving on his own to be on the cutting edge, and expects to be paid for his work (he feels he’s already done the internship route and proved himself).  He is calm about this.  He is focused.  I’m the one freaking out inside.  I’ve heard my whole life “Everyone needs a college education to get a good job”…yet many people in their 20’s  (as well as older adults) who have expensive university educations are looking for work that pays a living wage.

My child has his own vision.  I trust my son and support his wisdom.  And if in a few years he decides that a college education would be beneficial to him, he’ll have the money saved up, or the contacts made, to create a path where he doesn’t have debt.  That’s pretty amazing planning/thinking for a 17 year old.

Book: Choosing Easy World

photo 1You know all those books that tell you “just have a positive mental attitude?”  Well, this book is the manual on how to achieve that effortlessly.   Read this mix of practical examples, storytelling, science, and you can be in easy world as well.   If you believe there could be parallel universes or realities…why not parallel worlds of difficult and easy?  This book gives tools to actively (or at times quite passively) change your perspective to make joy your main operating source instead of fear/control/worry.

 

Julia Rogers Hamrick’s writing style makes this book a fast read.  I can see how many of the good things that have happened to me, the “wow, I can’t believe my luck!” experiences, took place when I was in what this book refers to as ‘Easy World’.  It’s the world of flow, of connection, of joy and fun and hard work that ends in satisfaction.  This Easy World perspective isn’t a striving place or a place of pushing, worry, stress, etc.    And it’s not a pill you take once and everything is peachy.  It’s a place to live.  Take a journey through Choosing Easy World by Julia Rogers Hamrick, and see if your perspective changes for the better.

Easy new way to eat oranges

photo 2It’s that time of year where oranges are plentiful, in season, and an easy and sweet vitamin C fix. But having to peel the darn things leaves pith under fingernails, as well as the possibility of getting more sticky sweet juice on your fingers then in your mouth.  Well, here’s a novel idea of how to eat oranges where you create a wonderful easy long carpet of juicy orange that you can eat right off the skin!  No pith under your fingernails!  No juice running down your hands!  Just a few cuts with a knife and you’ll be getting all that orange AND juice where it belongs – in your mouth.

Your welcome.